I need to be more discreet!!!

I'm looking for a friend

But I need to be discreet. 

For if I get caught, 

I surely will be beat. 

My name i can't reveal, 

So I call myself Chip. 

With a body of steal,

Can't destroy this spaceship. 

I've been looking for Gus, 

A friend I once lost. 

But its been so long, 

Who knows what's been tossed. 

I can't seem to find him, 

I know he was bus napped. 

I brought him some oil, 

'Cause I'm sure he's all chapped. 

So I take people to and from earth. 

A place I know very well. 

But traveling to mercury yesterday, 

Was like walking through hell. 

I sweat like a whore in church, 

It was the hottest I've been. 

I got real grossed out when my back

Melted and was shaped into a fin.

I asked around when I landed 

While I was filling up on potion, 

Ever since we went Black Magic

There's no gas to be in motion. 

We aren't green, but no pollution, 

So I guess we can settle. 

They got rid of popcorn,  

Even Cheddar, Chocolate, and Kettle

I asked the man who was filling me up

If he had heard of my friend Gus.

"Who hasn't heard about that crazy Brazilian,

I heard they tore up that bus. 

They took him apart, 

Put him back together, 

Now he's Gus the Bus, 

In extremely tight leather.

Why did you know him, 

Were you guys friends?"

"No, I just heard 'bout. 

Let me know how it ends."

I didn't feel right, 

Something was wrong. 

So I waited 'til I took off

'Til I could inhale my bong.

I'm glad that scientists 

Were able to prove, 

That hitting a bong 

Puts you in a better mood.

So now that it's legal,

And no one thinks it's lame.

I will search until I find

The bus with a name.